Summer officially arrived in England a couple of days ago. Awesome. It’s only about a month or so late, which in all fairness is pretty early compared to some other years.
Now, however, it won’t go away.
I’m no big fan of the sun. All it seems to do is make me feel uncomfortably hot and clammy, burn me to a crisp and try to kill me either by blinding me while riding my motorbike, or giving me severe heat stroke. I’m the sort of person who books a holiday in a hot country specifically for the sun, then spends the entire time lounging about in the shade.
Basically, I’ve had enough of it. So if by some strange coincidence the sun reads this blog, then please, for the sake of vulnerable, pale people like me who aren’t used to your presence, please go away.
And if the rain also reads this blog, that doesn’t mean I’m inviting you to come here in it’s place. You can go away too. In fact, stay away. Never come back. And if you absolutely must come back, make sure I’m indoors or I won’t be very happy.
Thanks for listening.